She Is in the Wind

Our daughter Katie checked herself out of the group home this week. She said she needed freedom. Since nobody has legal custody over her, she was free to go and nothing we offered her enticed her to stay. During this last week she tried to get a loan online and ended up having her identity and credit stolen. Her bank account is frozen and she is so manic she can't be reasoned with at all. She walked away from her job without giving notice and cut off several people that were trying to help her. Katie's plans changed repeatedly as she tried to find someone to take her in. We offered to put her into a hotel for a few days while we tried to reset her life in some way, but she refused. Instead, she bought an airplane ticket to Florida, slept in the airport all night and has taken off for a distant friend's home. She is sure she will get a job in Florida at Walmart and all will be just great. She is also sure that her Medicaid and SSI will transfer within a matter of days, too.

She admitted that her ultimate goal was always to get to Florida and this friend. We are utterly exhausted and heartbroken. We are also so confused. She has a low IQ and makes so many crazy, dumb mistakes. Yet she managed to go to the airport and buy a ticket all by herself. She has never flown before! One thing I can always say about Katie. She has way more guts than anyone else I know. She throws herself into all kinds of things with no caution for her well being. She has always been this way. 

So far, she is sending a text here and there. I am not sure that will continue once she actually makes it to her friend. She generally only keeps up relationships that are useful to her. We won't be useful soon.

Everyone on her team is beside themselves and some are shocked. I am a little less surprised. Katie generally does what she wants and there is almost no way to stop her. Some others on her team thought she could be enticed to stay or that she would care about her commitments or relationships with them. I knew none of that was true and thought she was getting close to running. That knowledge doesn't make this experience any easier, though. 

We are facing one more hard week on the schedule before embracing Christmas. I pray things calm down and Katie is safe so we can relax a little bit in December. 

Blessings, Dawn

Can Tea Save My Sanity?

 

It was a mega tea cup kind of week. Unfortunately, there is still a fair amount of crazy in my world, so this is going to be a brief post. 

My mother had nasal surgery this week to try to improve her sleep apnea. She is doing a bit better than she usually does with surgery but is still suffering a great deal. She never does well with surgery and often needs double the recovery time suggested by doctors. She is staying with us while she recovers.

The real and ongoing chaos this week is coming from our daughter Katie. She has been very, very manic for a few weeks now. Her meds really are not working; in fact, I feel like they are working against her. When she is frightened and manic, she becomes a very demanding person and extremely concerned about her health. This leads to a host of doctor appointments, 911 calls, ambulance rides and emergency room visits. Sometimes, doctors find issues and other times not. She really struggles to advocate for herself in an appropriate manner (that is, she becomes nasty and profane), which quickly alienates the people who are trying to help her. On top of her mental health state, she had a nasty bicycle accident last weekend. It took several days and ER/Urgent Care visits for x-rays to finally show a hairline fracture in her clavicle (shoulder). She is in a great deal of pain. Unfortunately, her group home (which provides low level support to supposedly independent adults with mental health issues) is really not up to the task and seems to be handling her all wrong and even unkindly. This is making her want to run into the night to all kinds of places she thinks she would be happier and free from authority. Her desire most recently is to move to Florida because the ocean would be calming. There is no plan on how she would live or where she would stay in Florida. It is obvious to most of us that she needs a higher level of care, not total freedom. There is no reasoning with her right now. This is the nature of an adopted person who suffers from RAD, Fetal Alcohol, Schizoaffective and Bipolar Disorders and probably Borderline Personality Disorder. This combination of mental health disorders is so hard to interact with, and I am sure terrible to live with for my Katie. 

So when she calls at all hours of the day and night, I answer the phone and try to calm her. I try to focus on one topic and solve one tiny thing for her, if I can. But it all feels like it is caving in right now and that we could lose her to the streets at any moment. I have spent many, many hours this week on the phone with a social worker friend, who also is trying to help Katie. Prayers are very much appreciated. 

On a happier note ~ Tim got his very first paying job this week! He has done more than a dozen years of volunteer work, but this month he applied for a job working in a tiny board game store that we have frequented for years. They gave him an interview and hired him later that day. He will be working two days a week for a total of about 10 hours. He is very excited. We are so proud of him!

Blessings, Dawn

A Happy Halloween and Goodbye October

We had a sweet and peaceful Halloween. Unfortunately, we never get any trick-or-treaters, even though we live on a busy street (although a street without sidewalks). In this town, people seem to trunk or treat at the churches or go to a few specific neighborhoods. Never mind, we made our own fun. We dressed up the cats for just a few minutes. We had a fun feast and put on festive hats. We played a fun and very challenging trivia candy game from Universal Yums. The guys decided to watch scary movies after the game. Rebekah and I decided to dress up and walk around one of those popular trick-or-treat neighborhoods to see all the costumes and decorations. Some of the houses really went all out this year. Elijah managed to avoid my camera this entire week...the stinker!

Eve as a pumpkin.

Rosie as a sweet witch.

Salem as a cute bat. The wings flapped when she ran around.

Monster chocolate muffins

Mummy hot dogs.

Rebekah at work with her coworkers. They had the theme of witches this year.

Most of the candy was good.

Rebekah was a Hex girl from Scooby-Doo and I was a steampunk lady.

We took a lovely morning drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway. The leaves are giving a beautiful show this year. 

We are already several days into November and the pace of life is picking up. So much excitement to come!

Blessings, Dawn