As for us ~ her family ... Now that we have escaped the chaos, screaming, taunting, hitting, pinching, biting, growling, death threats, destruction of property, stealing, sneaking, and hatred that Goldilocks treated us to everyday, we don't want to live that way anymore. Who could blame us? For ELEVEN years we did everything professionals told us to do and for ELEVEN years she treated us like that. We have discovered what it is like to breathe, relax, take a mid-day catnap without worrying about anyone's safety, and just enjoy each other. All of the children, including our adult son, have begged us to never let her come back. This whole situation is so heartbreaking. We can't make any promises to them. The state certainly expects to put her back someday. Even Goldilocks says she plans to come home someday (when she is ready but she's clear she doesn't want to come home at this time). Don't get me wrong -- we all love Goldilocks. We want what is best for her. We will fight for a long time into the future to give her the best opportunities we can. However, I totally can't imagine LIVING IN THE SAME HOUSE with her again. Our hearts are bleeding, and we are being stretched in ways that are so painful.
A few more changes and facts ~
- Our private caregiver's license has finally come through. Goldilocks should be authorized for this service in a matter of days. All this means that we should be done with the phase of private paying within a week. Thank goodness. We are totally out of money and she was going to have to move, possibly out of the state in a matter of days. We look forward to only paying the co-pay which is still many hundreds of dollars every month. However, hundreds of dollars is better than thousands of dollars every month, and while we are struggling financially, we will find a way to cope.
- She should be able to stay in day treatment for six to nine months.
- We are hoping that she can stay in intensive therapeutic foster care for at least a year ~ hopefully longer.
- Goldilocks and the rest of the kids saw each other at the state fair last week. Her class was on a field trip and we ran into them. It was the first time the kids had seen each other since that fateful night that Goldilocks ran away. Everyone was really stressed by the encounter, even though it was peaceful.