Friday, May 16, 2014

Friday Wrap Up ~ Swimming Along

The Process of Grief ~ Seven weeks have passed since Goldilocks (13) ran away and left our family. In the weeks that have followed we have experienced shock wave after shock wave. It is hard to explain all of the emotions our family has been through and will keep going through for some time now. The doctors, counselors and caseworkers compare our loss to divorce. Goldilocks has divorced us in a way. Whether she is cable of understanding that or not is another matter entirely. She shows little interest in having interactions with us and when we do talk, the conversations are very superficial. She has had no contact with her siblings since she left and there are no plans for a visit in the near future. In the last week, she was allowed to send each of them a card. Each child had a different reaction to the card. One was pleased but stated that he was glad she did not live at home right now because he felt so much safer, another was indifferent and the third child received a letter that was a bit bossy and it caused the child to become upset. Goldilocks is doing much better in her soon to be licensed intensive mental health foster home. However, she is still hearing voices, having dissociative events, processing information in very confused ways and generally being tormented by her emotions. Most of the professionals say (off the record) that she likely will never be able to live at home again, but we will be able to retain custody, have visits and advocate for her. They have to say "off the record" because the system will try everything possible to place her back in the home at some point. As more and more alarming information has come in from the mental hospital and therapy appointments, I have to agree with the experts. We really had no idea how much danger our family was in! This story could have ended in a much more tragic way (and still could). I will continue to share about Goldilocks and her journey. However, I will probably not share about her every single week. Although I will continue to have contact with Goldilocks during her weekly therapy sessions and we love her very much, it is time to refocus on our family's healing. Part of that healing is embracing all that is good and not dwelling so much on all of the pain. Please know that we appreciate all of the prayers that many of you have blessed our family with during this difficult journey.

My typical breakfast these days.
It feels good to get a jumpstart on eating all of the fruits and veggies we should eat each day.

Mother's Day ~ This was the calmest Mother's Day I have had in 12 years. On Mother's Days 12 years ago, I was sitting in the hospital with the newborn foster baby we had just received, Tom Sawyer. He was a really sick little guy. From that year forward, our Goldilocks always had a very hard time with Mother's Day. It is a big trigger day for kids with trauma. What a difference it was this year. The family planted our "pizza garden" (tomatoes, peppers, onions, basil and eggplant). We also planted potatoes and a pumpkin plant. We went to church and then Little Red Riding Hood and I went out to lunch with my Mom. It was a nice, peaceful day.

My little guy was not really feeling up to helping with the garden.

Little Red Riding Hood ~ has been reading a new series of books. She has been reading a book a day. I love to see her enjoying reading so much!

Poetry Tea with Shel Silverstein ~ We finally got around to having another poetry tea. Grandma read the children many poems from Where the Sidewalk Ends. The kids loved having a poetry tea with Grandma while I was away at a meeting.

Our Favorite Thing in Homeschool this week ~ We all are really enjoying reviewing some musicians we learned about earlier in the year with the book Legends, Icons, and Rebels: Music that Changed the World. The book does a short, two page spread of 28 musicians and then has a CD that plays one of the songs for each musician that made him or her famous. We have been reading about each musician and then watching some of the songs mentioned on YouTube. This week we studied Louis Armstrong, Billie Holiday and Ella Fitzgerald.

Tom Sawyer ~ Tom Sawyer received his J-Brace and attended another session with his physical therapist. The swelling is dramatically reduced and he is starting to feel much better. His therapist said that he will have to do lots of strength building of all of the muscles in his legs. His joints are very loose, and the only way to control them is to have strong and long muscles, which does not come naturally to those who have cerebral palsy.

Blessings, Dawn


  1. We are still praying for your family and hope that you are all able to transition to this new life.

    Amber read that series of books a while ago too. She loved them. There are several related series as well. I remember well the obsession she had with those books.

    I'm glad you had a quiet Mother's Day. Those are sometimes the best.

    Have a good week!

  2. I am sorry it has been so painful. I hope all can embrace this time for healing.. Hard stuff. God bless

  3. Oh Dawn I am so sorry about your situation. We pray for Goldilocks and your family every day. I can not imagine how hard it is for you. I think you have such an amazing attitude about it and pray for healing for you all. Your Mother's Day looks like such fun. I love the idea of a pizza garden!!! We just can't grow anything because of rabbits and squirrels. Keilee read those books a few years ago and really liked them. I love the music book too!!! I love that it has a CD to accompany it. Happy weekend friend. I hope it is beautiful for you and your family.